#31/32/33 Chicken Strips, Potato Salad, & Slaw

As soon as I sat down with my tray I thought "this is exactly what a giant fat person like me who doesn't know how to diet would think they could eat healthy at Tat's."

Yeah, it's a 3-fer. I've got some side-dishes to knock off the list and this sounded like a good combination. It leave me in a position to pull a second 3-fer with the Wings, Macaroni Salad, and a House Salad. Then I've still got the Antipasta and Chop Salad, one of which I'll probably get with the Chili Cheese Fries. If I double up and get some Old Bay Fries with the Kosher Dog then that leaves me with a total of 3 breakfast visits and 10 lunch visits before I'm done with the menu. If any friends of the blog want to get in on a joint Tat's offensive, now is your chance. I'm going on a diet of vegetables and porridge after this is done to get back down to my fighting weight.

Chicken Strips: "Regular or Buffalo with ranch, bleu cheese, or bar-b-que sauce." I went Buffalo and there was mild or hot, hence the "hot hw sauce" on the receipt. Got a small side of Slaw and Potato salad.

They say "All salads are made fresh, in-house..." but you wouldn't know it, truth be told. The slaw is the same as on the Tat'strami, looks like it's made from bagged pre-cut cabbage/veggies, and the sauce is kind of a compromise. A little bit of vinegar, a fair amount of sweet. A little creamy. Sort of the slaw you'd make to not offend anybody. It's fine, better than the nasty shit you get at Ivar's or some other fish'n'chips place, but not as good as homemade slaw. The potato salad couldn't differentiate itself from store-bought stuff that comes in 5 gallon buckets any less. Bits of nasty celery, no real potato flavor, just sort of mushy and mayonaisse-y. Not much to say. It didn't give me the shits, so I can't complain too much. Would never order either of them again.

The Chicken Strips are pretty solid. They aren't anything to bring somebody here to eat, and if you've had chicken wings at any dive bar with minimal cockroaches then you know what you're getting here.

None of this is the highlight of the Tat's menu. This is the ancillary stuff. You already make slaw for sandwiches, so put it on the menu as a side. You already make chicken for sandwiches, so put it on the menu minus the bread. This is "move along" stuff and none of you care, and neither do I. Just checking the boxes at this point, waiting on that Twinburger Sub and figuring out how I'm going to choke down the Roast Veggie.

#30 Meatball

Took a late lunch stroll to Tat's once the linecam told me things had emptied out. It started raining on the way so I thought I'd try waiting it out and eating at Tat's in spite of my favorite seat being occupied (yeah, I said it. so what?).

Meatball motherfucker.

"Tat's meatballs and marinara sauce, broiled w/ Mozzarella & Parmesan"

Mozz and Parm, holy shit. So much mozzarella.

Meatballs like god damned Pompeii, buried under ashes and pumice and shit. It's a surefire heart attack wrapped in bread. Really good.

#29 B.L.T.

"Thick-cut crisp Bacon...mmmm bacon" is the Tat's menu description of the BLT. Classic Tat's menu description. Inappropriate capitalization, ellipsis, seemingly drunken internal monologue commentary. If only it had an ampersand it would be the quintessential listing.

I was planning to hit up Tat's on Friday of last week but my friend wanted to mix it up, so we headed to Salumi at just before they open at 11. The line was 50 people deep, a mix of unimaginative yuppies and tourists. Friday is the worst day to get lunch in Pioneer Square. We ended up heading to Delicatus on 1st, which was terribly mediocre and undeserving of the little bit of good feedback I'd heard. A $10 sandwich should not be disappointing. The bar is low. Wish I'd gone to Tat's, so I made it up to myself today.

Following on the bacon-heels of the Bacon, Egg, & Cheese breakfast sandwich, I decided to cross another Hoagie off of my list. Just the Roast Veggie, Tuna, and Egg Salad remain, unsurprisingly. There's a 99% chance the egg salad will be next on the Hoagies and the Tuna Salad will be last.

Good ol' Tat's, putting the B in BLT. This isn't a sandwich I'd order under normal circumstances. I make BLTs under one circumstance: I've got homemade bacon and fresh local tomatoes. None other. Not really my jam. You need killer ingredients, and as I've covered before, Tat's bacon is just fine, grocery store quality stuff. This isn't fine dining, it's a $1 per inch hoagie. And for what it is, god damn it was good.

I spiced mine up with yellow mustard, oil, and vinegar. It was a good choice. The mustard and vinegar helped cut the cold fat of the bacon. I'd have been a lot happier with hot, or even warm bacon. The tomatoes were nice and ripe, and there was a ton of lettuce. I love iceburg lettuce. White people are so fucking corny.